The jaguar and the cougar

So I’m home, and like I always do when I travel, I got sick, so I’ve felt like death ever since the airport. So this post is actually a little delayed, but I couldn’t not tell this story.

Our vacation was the best ever. I mean, it’s weird, I wasn’t planning on sleeping with half the hotel. Because it’s not exactly an intelligent decision to sleep with half the hotel right at this particular moment.

Of course, Kazander and I are vaccinated, because we’re not Fox-worshiping sheep, but even so, I still have leukemia and people are idiots. I wasn’t planning on doing anything with anybody.

So we met this girl. And just like the sisters, I swear she walked right out of a porno.

She was 20 years old. Columbian. A librarian (complete with the cute big hipster glasses). Smart as all fucking hell. She speaks Spanish and Portuguese, as well as English, and she knows about philosophy and history and politics.

She’s a vegetarian because it’s more environmentally sustainable, but she admits that she loves steak and chicken nuggets every once in a great while, and she only just recently tried bacon for the first time, and oh my god, you guys, the way her eyes lit up as she gushed about how amazing bacon is, it was like watching a little kid at Christmas.

And yeah, her hotness puts even the sisters to shame, but it was her mind that caught my attention. It started because Kazander and I admitted that we don’t know basically anything about Columbia, except for drugs and Pablo Escobar.

And she sat there and gave us an entire history lesson about him. And it was amazing, you guys.

I mean, first, I love shit like that. I love seeing those other perspectives. And as smart as she is, her perspective was brilliant. She explained how he rose to power, why he became so popular, and how Columbia teaches kids about him. It was so much more in depth than anything I ever learned here.

I mean, of course he was still a bad guy, everyone knows that. But there was so much more to that story than I ever knew.

She carried her laptop with her, everywhere she went, and multiple times during our conversation, she’d open it up and look up a word she didn’t quite know the right translation for, or a fact she couldn’t quite remember.

And I don’t think I’ll ever get used to just how friendly and kind people in Latin countries are. I see it in Mexico all the time, and it always takes me by surprise, but she put even Mexicans to shame.

Just bubbly and outgoing and the sweetest, nicest girl you could ever meet. And easily one of the smartest people you could ever meet.

Needless to say, we all hit it off.

And then we really hit it off.

At one point, she ended up with her tongue down my throat. Then down Kazander’s throat. Then she wanted a three-way kiss.

Then she wanted a three-way.

And I mean, I was not about to deny this sweet Columbian naughty librarian what she wanted. I’m not a monster.

We brought her back to our room, and the entire way there, she was just a damn wildcat. Pawing at me, kissing and biting, climbing all over me. Once we got to the room, Kazander wanted to hop in the shower and rinse off (it’s humid. Lots of sweating), so I picked her up and carried her into the bedroom like I was carrying her across the damn threshold.

I tossed her on the bed, but she immediately jumped back up with a dark grin and just attacked me. Crazy aggressive, biting and scratching and tearing my clothes off.

And it just woke up that primal predator in me. I found myself almost growling, throwing her around, biting and clawing at her just as hard as she was biting and clawing at me.

I’m a few inches taller than her, and much broader and stronger, but she was agile as fuck, and every time I threw her down, she immediately jumped right back up and pounced on me again.

By the time Kazander came out of the shower, the bed was completely destroyed, pillows were thrown across the room, I think her bra was hanging from the bedroom door, I mean, it was intense.

And yeah, pretty much all he could do at that point was lie back and let us have our way with him. The poor guy didn’t stand a chance.

By the time it was over, I was bruised, scratched, bleeding out of like eight different places, my sheets looked like a damn war had broken out on my bed.

And jesus christ, y’all, I think I met my match. I was exhausted.

I’m not 20 anymore, mkay. I’m not a young adult anymore, I definitely lean closer to “cougar” now. I don’t have the energy I did 15 years ago.

And my personal brand of intensity is slower, more mental, and usually involves a lot of carefully-planned build-up, gradually growing more and more intense until the sub feels like they’re going to absolutely break, before I finally let loose on them.

While she was just fucking explosive. No hesitation, no build-up, just a goddamn wild animal.

Honestly, she was like a jaguar. Small and lithe, aggressive, absolutely predatory, laughing and growling and trying her damndest to take a chunk out of me.

Finally, things died down, and I had Kazander walk her back to her room while I hopped in the shower and counted my battle scars.

He came back and shook his head, nursing his lip from where she’d kissed him goodnight and tried to take a chunk out of him, too.

“My fucking god, she’s crazy,” he said.

I laughed. “Yeah, she definitely is.”

And we all ended up making out again the next day, though (thankfully) we had to get up early the next morning for our Covid test, so we couldn’t stay out late. Because damn, she was ready for round 2, but I needed a day to recover after that.

Ah, to be 20 again.

Kazander made the comment that he was glad she was the last one we played with, because there was no way the sisters or the couple could have ever lived up to that.

I mean, how do you follow up something like that? How do you top that?

We got her contact info, and we’ve been chatting with her since we got home. When she turns 21, she wants to come to Vegas and hang with us for awhile, and yeah, that’ll be a hell of a lot of fun.

But holy hell, I think I’ll need to wear armor.