Facials are fun

So I’ve had the worst luck with electronics lately.  For the last two weeks, I’ve been without a computer.  But it finally got in, yay!

And there’s a lot to be happy about.

In two weeks, I’ll get to see Southern again.  It’s been a couple of years since I’ve seen him, so I’m looking forward to that.

And, for those of you who check out Jessie’s blog (and all of you really should), you may have noticed a fun little game I played with him, where he had to send a text to Kazander, asking him to cum in his mouth.

Fun stuff, it really is.

So he sent the message, and a few days later, Kazander and I pulled up to the house.

I was beaming from the moment we walked through the door.

Jessica was dressed in her gorgeous corset, backless panties, stockings, heels, her hair and makeup done.  She looked sexy as hell.

Her face looked so pretty, I just had to stick a penis in it.

And Kazander is quite the Top, as it turns out.  When we’d talk about how we wanted the evening to go, I often had to remind him that we could push Jessie, we could have all sorts of fun fucking with him, but we had to exercise some restraint, as well.

We had to toe the line between intense and too intense, but we couldn’t violently shove him into the deep end with no warning.

“Dear, if we break our toy, we won’t be able to play with her anymore.”

You know, balance.

But as I’ve said before, I’d much rather have to hold him back than try to pull enthusiasm out of someone who’s just not feeling it.  The fact that he’s sort of taken this and run with it is a million kinds of freakin’ awesome.

And he has the benefit of having been my sub for 7 years now, so he knows me, he knows the kinds of mindfucks I like, and he knows the general flow of how I like having sessions go.  His biggest kink is humiliation, so he’s very experienced in the field of receiving it.  Since he’s got the switchy tendencies, he can take what he finds hot when he’s in the submissive headspace and turn it around when we’re with Jessie.

So now I have someone to help me utterly humiliate and degrade my sissy.  Which is a huge, massive bonus for me.

We sat down on the couch, and I had Jessie get on all fours at our feet.  Only a moment later, Kazander’s cock was in her mouth.

I was determined to make it last longer than last time, though.  I wanted to really savor the experience.  I wanted to draw it out a bit, and let all three of us enjoy it.

Well, let two of us enjoy it, anyway.

That morning, and the previous night, I’d had Kazander cum.  Normally, I enjoy keeping him chaste and denied, so he doesn’t last very long when I do let him cum.

Last time, that (combined with Jessica’s exceptional cock-sucking skills) resulted in him cumming too quickly.  I made sure to prepare so that didn’t happen this time.

It was so hot watching Jessie suck Kazander’s cock, watching her head bob up and down as she deepthroated him.  She’s definitely been practicing.

After a moment, I knelt down on the floor next to her and reached behind her, rubbing her clit.  Her p-spot has always been so sensitive, and I wanted to see if rubbing it would have an effect on her cock-sucking.

You know, for science.

She started squirming, arching her back, pushing her ass out against my hand, very literally humping my hand while she sucked his cock.

I grinned and looked up to Kazander when I heard a soft moan come from her.  “Does this make a difference?” I asked him.

“Oh yeah,” he replied.  “Whatever you’re doing, she likes it.”

My hypothesis was confirmed.  Gotta love science.

It was so hot watching her, squirming and writhing and moaning, her moans muffled by Kazander’s cock.

One of the things Kazander had suggested earlier was giving Jessie a facial, and cumming on her face, instead of in her mouth.  I was intrigued by the idea, but didn’t really think much of it.  We’d already settled on making Jessie swallow his load.  I didn’t see a reason to change the plan.

But when Kazander told me he was getting close, I suddenly changed my mind.

“Stop,” I told her.  “Lie down on your back.  He’s going to cum on your face.”

So she did, obediently lying underneath Kazander, her head between his legs, her eyes closed, while Kazander jerked off onto her face.

And she looked so pretty with his cum all over her face.  But then again, she’s a sissy, it’s pretty common knowledge that they always look good drenched in real men’s cum.

She wasn’t done, though.  Before she could move, I reached down and rubbed it all over her face, then put a cum-covered finger against her lips.

“Open,” I said.

Reluctantly, she obeyed, and I pushed my finger into her mouth.

“Suck it clean, that’s a good girl.”

Kazander went to get himself cleaned up, and I had Jessie sit at my feet, rubbing Kazander’s cum all over her face and making her suck it off my fingers.

The awesome thing was after a few seconds, that reluctance disappeared, and she leaned against me, enthusiastically sucking and licking my fingers clean.

Like a good little cumslut.

And honestly, that was my favorite part of the whole thing.  Just the way she completely embraced that sissy mindset, the way she eagerly sucked the cum off my fingers, it was just so damn fucking hot.

My precious sissy whore.

After Kazander left, I let Jessie come up and sit next to me on the couch, and rubbed her clit some more.  She came again and again, with Kazander’s cum drying on her face, and the taste of it in her mouth.

There was a funny moment, though.  We all know she can’t cum like a man anymore, she doesn’t even squirt.

Every time she came, she looked down to Tammi Lynn, tucked away in her panties.

“Are you checking to see if you squirted?” I asked after the third-ish time.

“Hoping I had,” she answered.

“Hoping you’d squirted?  Why?”

“Because then at least there’d be something to get the taste out of my mouth.”

“Oh, you mean the taste of another man’s cum?  Was that what you meant?”

“How’d you guess?”

And naturally, I found that just wildly entertaining.

My sissy bitch was hoping she could cum like a man, so that I would feed it to her, to get the taste of Kazander’s cum out of her mouth.

That’s where her mind went.  That’s the solution she came up with for how to get the taste out of her mouth — using her own cum to do it.

I mean, how awesome is that?

My precious sissy is growing up.

A fun conversation

I do love when other people help me come up with ways to humiliate Sounder.

As it turns out, Kazander is pretty good at coming up with awesome ways to humiliate Sounder.

We were talking about him over the weekend, discussing things like how good he is at giving head and how cute he squirms when he’s being fucked.  I lamented the fact that no one other than me has seen just how cute Sounder squirms, and Kazander shrugged, saying, “Let’s change that.”

You know, that is just a capital idea.

But you know what would be more fun?  If Sounder is the one to ask Kazander to fuck him.

That would be so much more fun.

Except that’s not enough.

I want Sounder to be the one to initiate that conversation.  So I gave him Kazander’s number and told him that, in order for me to play with him again, he has to text Kazander and ask him to come with me, and put his cock inside Sounder.

Naturally, Sounder isn’t particularly thrilled about this fun little game of mine.  Being fucked by a man is going to be rough just on its own.  Having to be the one to ask for it to happen, to ask the man to fuck him, to take his virginity, is just icing on the cake.

It’ll be such a fun conversation.

Isn’t this an awesome game?

When you live in Vegas…

… What do you do when you want to get away?

I mean, we already live in the tourism capital of the world.  I was born here.  I was raised here.  It’s nothing new to me.  Nothing special.

So Kazander and I were looking at places to do another stay-cation this year.  We considered the Luxor again, but honestly, that place has just gone so far downhill, neither of us wanted to go there again.

Which is sad.  I remember when it first opened, when I was a kid.  I loved that place.  I loved staying there whenever my parents did a stay-cation.  The first time Kazander and I stayed there, I was shocked at how bad it had gotten, but I was still nostalgic.

After the second time, though, even I had to admit that it wasn’t what we wanted.

Where, then, would we go?

He suggested the bustling metropolis of Laughlin (pronounced lof-lin, like in “loft”), NV, population, 8,000.

And I promptly laughed.

But then he said, “Well, they’ve got the river, and a couple of beaches, and jet skis and things.  It could be fun.”

Hmm, that’s actually a good point.

I’d driven through Laughlin a million times, but never actually stopped in the town.  I never gave it much thought.  It was just one more tiny little town in the middle of the desert.  A couple of casinos and a post office.

Big deal.

But the Colorado River is pretty cool, and I haven’t been to any part of the Colorado River since I was a kid.

So I looked it up.  And sure enough, there’s enough other stuff to do there to keep us entertained for a few days.

Who knew?

Hell yeah, actually.  I could definitely go for that.  It’s out in the middle of the desert, which I love, in a nice, climate-controlled room, which I love, literally right on the bank of the river, which I love.

Hell yeah.

So we made the reservations and drove out today.  We’re going back on Sunday.

And it just feels so damn good to get away.

Things are quickly reaching a boiling point with us living so close to his family.  I’ve been wanting to move out for years, but never really pressed the issue, because I don’t work, and that wasn’t fair to him.

Then, in the last year or so, I started pressing.  Because I need to get away from them.  I know myself well enough to know my patterns, and they’ve been pushing me and pushing me.  When I break, there will be no going back.

And his MIL and SIL (Mother-in-law and sister-in-law) have officially gotten me to my breaking point.

I have a friend, who used to be SIL’s friend, until he realized the kind of human being she is.  But she did introduce us, and we hit it off great.

I was hanging out with him the other day when he got close and said, “I have something I need to tell you.”

My curiosity was piqued.  “What is it?”

“SIL has been asking about you and Kazander.”

“What do you mean?”

“Like, she’s been asking if you’re into any kinky or freaky shit.”

At first, I brushed him off.  “She’s done that before.  She’s just bored and nosey.”

But the friend was not so easily assuaged.  “She wants to find dirt on you to take the spawn from you.”

“WHAT???”

“She and MIL want you out of the picture.  They want to find a reason to declare you an unfit mother.”

“She said that?”

“Not in those words, but she might as well have.”

He’s not known for lying or exaggerating, or drama-mongering, so I completely believe him.

“But they’d never want to take her from Kazander,” i protested.

“They think he’ll side with them.”

I started to laugh, then stopped, thinking back to all the times MIL just insisted that Kazander would side with her on different things, or agree with her, or take her (poor) advice, etc.

Yeah, she absolutely would think Kazander would side with her.

Holy fucking hell.

So I got home and told Kazander what was going on.  He was shocked, but dismissive, and that angered me.

And I mean, I could see where he was coming from.  He would never side with them over me, so there’s nothing they would ever be able to do.  They could talk to lawyers if they want, but I have no record, I don’t do drugs, I volunteer with homeless veterans, I’m a total, upstanding citizen and all that jazz.  I mean, there’s not a lot they could use.  They’d have to do some serious digging to find anything remotely close, and he pointed out that they’re not intelligent or creative enough for that.

Okay, so cool, I’m in no immediate danger of losing my child.

That’s not the whole point, though.

Because we are living in an environment where people are conspiring behind my back to take my daughter from me.  Whether or not they can succeed is irrelevant.  I don’t want to be around that, and I don’t want my daughter around that.

That’s toxic.

So I told Kazander, “We need to move.”

He scoffed.  “We’re not going to move.  They can’t do anything.  There’s no point.”

“I don’t care if they can’t do anything.  It’s the fact that they want to do something!”

But he remained dismissive.  Even after I said, “Either we need to move out, or I do.”

So I started looking at options.

I wasn’t going to play tug-of-war with my child.  If they want her so bad that they’re willing to destroy her entire world, then fine.  They can have her.  Losing one parent would devastate her, but if Kazander’s family went through with this, she would either lose both parents (if his MIL and SIL won), or every member of her extended family (if he and I won).

That would hurt her so much more.  God, that would crush her.  I don’t think she could easily recover from that.  It’s been so central to her whole world, her whole existence, ever since she was born.

God… That would… That would just kill her.

I could never let that happen to her.

And I have faith in my daughter.  I have faith in the way I raised her.  I have faith that, even if she’s brought up around those pathetic, terrible, small people, she will know the truth as she gets older.

It was Sounder who suggested another tactic, one that would keep my family together.

So I talked to Kazander again.  I told him I wanted to move out.

He said, “What if I want to stay?”

I shrugged.  “Then you can stay.”

That angered him a bit.  “You’d break up with me over that?”

“Over your family having ridiculous amounts of control over us?  Over you choosing them and that control over me and your daughter?  Yes the fuck I would.”

So we agreed on a six-month trial run.  We’ll get an apartment for six months, and then reassess and decide if living away from them is worth the inconvenience of not having them there.

And of course we won’t be going far.  The family is still so important to the spawn, so we’d absolutely bring her over 2 or 3 times a week to spend time with them, or even spend the night once in awhile.  But she won’t be spending weeks with them anymore.  I told Kazander, in no uncertain terms, that’s coming to an end.

I want to be moved out by the time the spawn starts school.  So I’m looking at apartments and Kazander is talking to his dad about how he’s going to manage the finances without living there.  It can be done.

It will be done.  Because staying there, keeping the status quo, is not an option anymore.

I’m stressed.  All the time.

I’m on edge.  All the time.

I’m short-tempered and irritated.  All the time.

I can’t do this anymore.  And I hated having to give him the ultimatum, but I was literally at a point where it was either that, or I would have to walk away.  I’m not going to live in a place where people conspire to take my family from me.

It’s just not happening.

So due to the financial burden that moving out will be, we decided not to go to Cancun, as we’d planned in October.  We’d need that for moving costs and rent.

But Kazander said, “With us not going, you really just need to get away for a few days.  You need to get out of the house.”

Yeah, I really did.

Okay, so Kazander and I have very different ideas of a perfect vacation accommodation.  I want a nice room.  I want a suite.  I want… not crazy expensive, but definitely not Motel 6.  At least 3 stars.

Kazander hates paying more than he absolutely has to for a room.  He’d do Motel 6’s the entire way.

And I get where he’s coming from.  When we go on vacation, we have a budget.  He’d rather spend the money on activities and cool things to do than the room.  Where I would rather do cheap or free activities and be comfortable in the room.

So we’ve always compromised, and met in the middle.

Not this time.

We’re staying 4 nights, in a casino that has two separate kinds of suites.  The second-tier suite, and the first-tier suites.  He said we could get the top-tier suite.

You guys don’t understand.  He has never agreed to anything even remotely like that, much less offer it himself.  I was blown away.

And I appreciated the hell out of that.  So I looked on the casino’s website, juggled some things around, combined a couple of promo packages, and found something that was $300 cheaper (I’m really, really good at doing that.  I’m good at finding deals when I need to).

We’ll stay the first two nights, tonight and tomorrow, in the second tier suite.  Then, on Friday, we’ll check out of that room and into the top-tier suite, where we’ll spend Friday night and Saturday night.

After him going so far as to give me the best suite in the hotel, I’m more than happy to have the second best for two nights to save him some money.  It’s definitely worth the minor inconvenience of checking out and then checking back in.  And the packages I combined come with some nice benefits and coupons that save us even more money on food and activities.  So all in all, we’re looking at saving about $500.

Hell yeah, I’ll take the second tier suite for that.

So we drove out today, checked in, and walked up to our room.

And the room isn’t bad.  I mean, you have to understand, it’s Laughlin.  This is not Vegas.  This is not even close to Vegas.  The casino resort we’re staying in is, according to what I read, the nicest one in Laughlin.

…… That doesn’t really say much for Laughlin, m’kay.

Without the promo, after taxes and fees, the second tier suite would have cost $5 more than the pyramid suite at the Luxor for the same nights.  And it’s about that quality, just without the big tub that the Luxor suite had.  Or without the 12 years of dust hanging from the air conditioning vent that the Luxor suite had.

I mean, it balances out.

Still, kinda disappointing when you’re under the impression these are the “elite” rooms offered.

But it’s nice, it’s comfortable, we had a fantastic view of the sunset from our room, and the river is beautiful, and brings back so many memories.  We’re going on a river cruise, we’re going to one of the beaches, we’re thinking about renting jet skis, I mean, it’ll be a really awesome stay.

 

Sounder is coming out this weekend, too, to spend some time with us.  And honestly, both Sounder and Kazander are doubtful, but I promise, promise, promise that my reason for wanting him to come out to spend time with us is not to play, but to just hang out.

Kazander and Sounder are complete opposites in a lot of ways, but they’re almost eerily alike in other ways, especially regarding their senses of humor.  I think they’d get along really well.

And my dream is to have all of us live together one day.  Sounder and Kazander will have to spend way more time with each other than the occasional drink at a bar or the occasional cock in Sounder’s mouth to find out if that’s a possibility or not.

These are two very strong personalities, in two very strong men.  It could turn out wonderfully, or it could turn out badly.  I’ve had enough tense roommate situations to know that I don’t want to jump in to one again, without at least an idea of what we can expect and how we can all put in concentrated effort to make it work.

The only way to be able to make any sort of educated prediction about that is to have them spend more time together.

That’s why I want Sounder to come out.  Not to play.

Although, of course, while we’re in the room, I’ll expect him to wear girls’ clothes.  I mean, that’s just a given.  He should be wearing girls’ clothes 24/7 when he’s not in public, anyway.  Obviously he’ll wear it here, too.

And I mean, should the opportunity for play present itself, I won’t stop it.  As I told Sounder earlier today, I will never pass up the opportunity to put a cock inside him.

But even if we do play, that’ll just be a small, short part of the evening.  That’s not going to be the bulk of our interactions while he’s here.  For the most part, it’ll just be chill, seriously just innocent hanging out.

So yeah, y’all…. I am beyond looking forward to the next few days.

And for someone who lives in Vegas, who has done the “Vegas tourist” thing over and over and over again, this is a welcome change.  Hell, this might actually turn out to be my new favorite stay-cation place.  Who knew?

Kazander often has good ideas, but he hit it way out of the park with this one.  That was just sheer fucking brilliance.

Who would’ve guessed, Laughlin?

Past the point of no return

You have come here
In pursuit of your deepest urge
In pursuit of that wish which till now has been silent…
Silent…

I have brought you
That our passions may fuse and merge
In your mind you’ve already succumbed to me
Dropped all defenses, completely succumbed to me
Now you are here with me, no second thoughts
You’ve decided…
Decided…

Past the point of no return
No backward glances
The games we’ve played till now are at an end
Past all thought of if or when
No use resisting
Abandon thought and let the dream descend
What raging fire shall flood the soul?
What rich desire unlocks its door?
What sweet seduction lies before us
Past the point of no return
The final threshold?
What warm, unspoken secrets will we learn
Beyond the point of no return?

M’kay, so my geek was showing there for a second.  But there’s not a whole hell of a lot out there more fitting right now.  Andrew Lloyd Webber knows his shit.

Tonight was fun.  Like, seriously fun.  Like, a million different kinds of fun.

Like, whoa.

So there’s this adorable sissy I own.  And earlier this week, I’d decided that he was going to take a big step forward today.

He was going to suck cock.  No big deal, there.  He’s done it before.  But this time, he was going to finish, and swallow.

Not a huge difference, right?

Heh, heh…

Poor Sounder.  It was a rough week for him.  Yesterday and today were the worst, of course.  I really turned up the fear factor, and gave him quite a bit to think about.

Oh!  And on… Thursday, I think?  While he was at work, he asked, “Did you ship something to me?”

“No, why?”

“I got a delivery notification.  I’m not expecting anything.”

Well, cool.  I didn’t think anything else of it, until later that night, when I asked what had been delivered.

His response was, “Yeah, God or whoever’s in charge definitely likes you more than me.”

I laughed.  “Why do you say that?  What was in the box?”

“Lingerie I ordered 6 months ago, and it never showed up.”

Ooooh, really?

I was intrigued.  Particularly when he was hopeful that it wouldn’t fit.

But, because the entire Universe works tirelessly to accommodate me, I received a text a few minutes later, after he’d tried it on.

“Of course it fits.”

“Is it pretty?”

He didn’t answer with words, but his answer was more than enough.

2017-05-07_23.27.53

Holy shit.

Like, ho-ly shit.

Um, yeah, it’s fucking pretty.

So yay!  He had amazing new lingerie to wear while he swallows cum.  And damn, that is some fucking hot lingerie.

I was even more excited.  I couldn’t wait for Sunday to get here.

So today, Kazander and I pulled up to Sounder’s house and knocked on the door.  He let us in, and I think my whole face lit up when I saw him, dressed up, his hair and makeup done, wearing one of my very favorite pairs of his panties, a pair with no back.

Actually, there’s a picture of him wearing that pair on his blog, along with some other incredibly sexy pictures.  And of course, I have it right here.

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I love these panties on him.  So pretty.

Dude, he was just so damn hot.  I didn’t wait, I barely dropped my purse and my bag on the floor before putting my hands on him, pushing him against the door and groping him.

I turned to Kazander.  “I love these panties on her.  They make her ass look so perky, don’t they?”

“Yeah, they do.  She’s fucking hot.”

And I just have to go on a quick tangent.  Because, while Kazander and I aren’t really “there” sexually with each other, he has become a really kind of amazing partner when it comes to Topping others.

I mean, he’s inexperienced as fuck, of course.  He struggles to find that balance between pushing limits and crossing lines.  As we were talking about how we wanted the night to go, I had to hold him back more than once, and remind him that if we break our toy, we won’t be able to play with her anymore.

But it’s awesome, it really is.  It’s so much better to have to hold someone back than it would be to try and encourage someone who just isn’t into it.

So I was excited, and turned on by how Dominant Kazander was through the whole thing, and how easily he fell into that role.  The two of us, sharing and using Sounder together, is pretty damn amazing, actually.

And Sounder really is such a fun toy to play with.  He was so nervous.  I’d been fucking with his head for days, and I wasn’t gentle.

I wasn’t gentle today, either.  I had him bend over the arm of the couch, his ass exposed and waiting.  Of course we were going to put things in it.

But I was nice, I went with something small (instead of the largest toy I have, which Kazander had wanted to use).  Kazander stood next to me as I eased the vibe into Sounder.

And once it was in, I asked Kazander if we wanted to do the honors.  He said, “Of course,” and took the vibe, fucking Sounder with it.

I stepped to Sounder’s side, putting one hand on the back of his neck and the other on the small of his back, really driving home the fact that it wasn’t my hand fucking him.

Poor Sounder, he was so tense, trying so hard not to enjoy Kazander fucking him.  And for a few minutes, he succeeded.  But then, Kazander and I could hear his soft, occasional moans.

It was so much fun, it was so hot watching Kazander fucking him with the vibe, and watching Sounder enjoy it.

Kazander wanted to fuck him with more than the vibe, though.  He tried pretty hard to convince me to let him fuck Sounder right then and there.  And for half a second, I considered it.

But no, that’s the next step.  I wanted Sounder to taste cum for the first time.  I wanted him to actively make Kazander cum, feel him shoot his load, and consciously swallow it.

Being fucked will, in many ways, be harder for him to handle than sucking cock, but there’s a level of passivity there.  All he’ll have to do is bend over and stay still.  Hell, I could tie him down, even, and take away his choice in the matter.

The end result would still be the same, no matter which hole we used.  Sounder would have a man shoot his load into him.  He’d officially be my sissy cumdumpster.

But with a blowjob, he has to be the one to do it.  He has to make himself my sissy cumdumpster.  He has to make the conscious decision to obey me, to do this thing he really doesn’t want to do, to make me happy.

Sure I could tie him down and let men use him.  And I will.

But not the first time.  Not tonight.  Tonight was going to be all him.

We went upstairs, and I happily showed Kazander the beautiful, pink, lacy sissy bed that Sounder sleeps in.  And then Kazander sat down on that bed, took off his pants, and waited expectantly while I told Sounder to get on his knees.

I pushed Sounder forward, holding Kazander’s half-hard cock and sliding it into Sounder’s warm, wet mouth.  I didn’t even have to push hard, or tell Sounder to open his mouth, like I have in the past.  Sucking cock is starting to come easier to him, I think.

He’s a very good cocksucker.  Kazander didn’t last long.  He came, his cock throbbing as he shot his load into Sounder’s mouth.

And Sounder, the obedient, darling slut, didn’t spill a drop.  I watched him, Kazander’s cock still in his mouth, forcing himself to swallow.  The look on his face was just absolutely precious.

Afterward, Kazander put on his clothes and went out for a cigarette, while I stayed there with Sounder, him on all fours on the floor.

“You’re a cumdumpster now,” I told him, my hand between his legs, rubbing his p-spot.  “And you’re going to cum with the taste of his cum still in your mouth.”

He didn’t take long, either.  I let him up, told him he could change, and that I’d meet him downstairs.  Kazander was ready to leave (we’d taken separate cars because he wanted to get home quickly).

But before he left, I asked him what he thought of Sounder’s mouth.

“It was great.  She’s a talented cocksucker.”

And it was funny.  I said, “You know what we should’ve done?  I should’ve had you cum yesterday.  Or this morning.  So you’d last longer.”

He nodded.  “I was thinking the same thing,” he agreed.  “Oh well, now we know for next time.”

I grinned.  “Thinking about next time already?”

He shrugged.  “I’m never going to turn down a blowjob from a hot slut.”

He left, and Sounder came downstairs, and he and I settled on the couch to watch a movie.  I sat there, my arm around him and my hand around his neck, and he started pushing forward against my hand, wanting me to choke him harder.

At one point, he even took my hand, pressing it harder against his throat.

And for the record, it really doesn’t take much to make me go from normal to turned-the-fuck-on.  Like, not much at all.  Sometimes, all it takes is a hand on mine, and an unspoken request to be handled more roughly.

My hand went between his legs, rubbing his p-spot again.  He spread his legs, leaning back against me, squirming and moaning as I rubbed him to an orgasm.  And then another.  I didn’t stop, I didn’t give him time to rest, I just kept going.

With my other hand, I fondled his breasts, but when I finally pinched his nipple, and heard him gasp, “Yes, please yes,” I intensified everything.  Combining the pleasure and pain, it didn’t take long for him to cum again, pushing hard against me and crying out, still writhing uncontrollably.

I’d never seen him that turned on before.  The way he moved was different, his voice was different, his mannerisms were different.  And it made him bolder.  At one point, he slid off the couch, kneeling at my feet.

“May I?” he asked.

“Of course.”

He bent down, kissing my feet while I ran my fingers up and down his back.  But, while I certainly enjoyed that, I wasn’t done making him cum, and pulled him back up on the couch with me.

I actually lost track of how many times he came.  It was definitely more than five, and it might have been more than ten.  And holy hell, they were intense.  It was so damn hot to watch. His back arched, practically screaming, clinging to me, his legs thrashing as the sensations overwhelmed him.

And I still wasn’t done.  I got off the couch, lying him down flat as I sat beside him, still rubbing his p-spot with one hand, the other around his neck, and now I could choke him even harder.

He came again, one last time, arching his back so high, I was worried he might hurt himself.  But he didn’t, he lied limp on the couch, panting and gasping, still squirming just a little.

“Are you alright?” I asked, grinning.

“I don’t know… I can’t handle it.”

I laughed.  “That’s a good thing.”

I got up to wash my hands.  After a moment, he managed to pull himself to his feet.  I walked up to him, and he wrapped his arms around me.

“That… That was… Just mind-blowing,” he murmured.  “Earth-shattering.”

“I can see that.  Was it enough to make up for earlier?”

“That part actually wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be.”

“Well good, see?  You’re a true born sissy.  It all just comes naturally to you.”

Any other time, he, being that perfect mix of sweet and sarcastic, would’ve had a sarcastic answer to that.  But this time, he barely managed a half-muttered “uh, huh,” before pulling me close again and resting his head on my shoulder.

But he seemed really unsteady on his feet.  “Come on, let’s sit back down.”

We sat back down, I pulled him close and put my arm around him, and he rested his head on my shoulder.  And really, in less than two minutes, I realized he’d fallen asleep.  The poor thing, so worn out, so overwhelmed.

I sat back, resting my head against his, letting him rest while I watched the end of the movie.  Then, I woke him up, and he walked me out.

I think he’ll sleep well tonight.

And when he wakes up in the morning, in his sissy bed, he’ll remember exactly what it felt like to kneel at the edge of it, obediently swallowing cum.  And he’ll know that there’s no coming back from that.  For the rest of his life, he will never not be a sissy cum dumpster.

Past the point of no return
No going back now
Our passion play has now at last begun
Past all thought of right or wrong
One final question
How long should we two wait before we’re one?
When will the blood begin to race
The sleeping bud bursts into bloom?
When will the flames at last consume us?

Past the point of no return
The final threshold
The bridge is crossed, so stand and watch it burn
We’ve passed the point of no return

“Have a kid,” they said.

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They motherfuckin’ lied.

Out their ass.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my kid.  If I could do it all over again, I’d do it exactly the same way and all that trite bullshit.  She’s pretty damn awesome, if I do say so myself.  I’m kind of proud of myself for making such an awesome kid.

Brag moment (because I’m a parent and this is my blog and I can write about whateverthefuck I want to write about, even if it’s about my kid):

My daughter is in kindergarten, and smart as all hell.  No I’m serious, I know all parents want to think their kids are exceptional in every category.  But I’m not one of those parents.  There are certain things my kid just fucking sucks at.  She’s so damned sensitive and thin-skinned, and she just shuts down if she’s under stress (which I’m hoping is mostly just because she’s five and living a privileged life, and she’ll grow out of it).

Academia happens to be one of her strengths.  According to her most recent testing, she’s a full year ahead in reading and a year and a half ahead in math.  Kid is fragile as fuck, but it’s fine, she’ll be able to wipe her tears with hundred dollar bills when she’s an adult and an astrophysicist or some shit.

I went out and bought some second grade math books to do with her after her regular school lessons, and she’s flying through most those with relative ease.  And I’m having to do it because the pussies who run the homeschool program don’t want to bump her up to an appropriate level for fear of “challenging her too much.”

Oh, you mean shit in her life might actually be hard at some point?  The unmitigated horror!

We have to protect the children and give them participation trophies and create a completely unrealistic view of how the world works, and then bitch and complain when they grow up and are not sufficiently equipped to deal with shit.

Sigh

Whatever.  It’s fine.  I’m done fighting that battle this year.  It’s already half over anyway, and I had to fight to get her on independent study, and fight to allow her to skip the lessons she already exhibits mastery of, and fight to do all this stupid shit you’d think people who make a career out of providing the best education possible to future generations wouldn’t protest against.

But back to my point.

As many pros as there are to reproducing, the impact on one’s kink life is a rather significant entry in the con column.

Like last night.  Upon returning home from coffee with a friend at midnight-ish, I found Kazander lying on the couch, wearing his lacy panties, watching porn on his computer.

Moments later, I found myself sitting next to him, watching porn with him, pulling his panties off, and doing nice and not-so-nice things to his body.

And can I just say I love how masochistic he’s gotten lately?  Because I love how masochistic he’s gotten lately.  He’s never been one for a lot of CBT, but last night, when I pinched his cock and gripped his balls, he whimpered and curled up around me so sweetly, gasping and writhing in that sexy way of his.

Before long, I decided that just pinching wasn’t enough.  Out came the clothespins.

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It’s crazy how much better a dick looks when there are clothespins on it.

Slapping his balls, yanking on the clothespins, pinching and twisting his nipples, and biting his ear were my activities of choice to distract him from the video.

But, as is wont to happen when I watch porn, I got horny.  And I wanted a shower before making him go down on me.

So I set the computer down and told him he was going to pamper and bathe me.  Naturally, the clothespins were going to stay right where they were.

It was so much fun grinding my ass against his cock with the clothespins on.  Or running my fingertips lightly up his shaft, or nudging my knee against his groin.

And the noises he made when I finally took the clothespins off were just amazing.

The general plan was that he was going to lick me to an orgasm or two, then I would bend him over the edge of the bed and fuck him long and hard, and finally let him cum with my cock deep in his sore, raw, throbbing ass.

It started out well.  We went into our bedroom (which is right next to the kid’s bedroom) and locked the door, then I grabbed him by his hair and shoved his face in my cunt.

He licked me to one orgasm, but I wanted another one.  And I was almost fucking there when suddenly I heard crying from the next room.

“Oh, goddammit,” I muttered, pushing Kazander off me and opening the door.  I stood in the spawn’s doorway to see her sitting on the bed, crying.

She always wakes up at some point in the very early morning and comes to sleep in bed with me.  Apparently last night she woke up early.  Seeing that my bedroom door was closed, she went into the living room to look for Kazander, and didn’t see him there, so she started crying.

I reassured her, refilled her cup of water, and tucked her back in.

The mood was basically shot.

But I wasn’t completely cruel.  I would still let him cum.  Once I was sure she was alright and back in bed, I went back to the bedroom and closed the door.  I reached for a dildo and held it up for Kazander to see.

“Wanna take a guess where this is going?” I asked.

“Are you sure you want to do it?” he asked, referring to the possibility of another interruption.

“Yeah, but it’s going to be quick.”

So much for being able to endlessly tease and torment him.

I didn’t give him much time to get used to the size, and shoved the whole thing in him.

He was gasping and whimpering with pain, but his cute little clit was already dripping.  He really is such a butt slut.

It took only a minute or two before he came, I handed him a towel to clean up, pulled the dildo out of him, and that was the somewhat underwhelming finish to what I had intended to be a much longer play session.

Oh well.  We can always try again.  And only 13 more years until she goes off to college.

I’m not the right person to ask

… pretty much any relationship question, really.

Kazander and I were in the living room.  I was reading and he was re-watching an old show he likes, Sons of Anarchy (possible minor spoilers ahead, if you care about that sort of thing).  He was watching the scene in which Jax is cheating on Tara with a porn star.  Tara walks in to the clubhouse, and asks Jax’s best friend, Opie, if Jax is there.  Opie lies and tells Tara that Jax isn’t there.  So Tara walks into the back, to find Jax and the girl in bed together.

Kazander paused the show, turned to me, and said, “Would you be mad?  If you were Tara, I mean?”

“If you cheated on me?  Uh, yeah.”

“No, would you be mad at Opie?”

“Of course I would.  He lied.”

“But that’s been his best friend basically since birth.”

“I don’t care.  I’d be done with him.”

“So you’d forgive me, but be mad at him?”

“I never said I’d forgive you.”

“Assuming you did.  Assuming you’d forgive me, would you forgive him?”

“I don’t think I’m the right person to ask.”

“Well, let’s use me and Red.  Red is one of my best friends, and you two are cool.  If Red lied to protect me, would you forgive him?”

“No.”

“That’s something I never understood about women.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’d forgive me, but you’d hold it against him?”

I laughed.  “I wouldn’t forgive you.”

He paused.  “You wouldn’t?”

“Absolutely not.”

“You wouldn’t forgive me?”

I put my book down and turned to face him.  “I have let you fuck another woman in my bed.  More than once.  And I’ll let you do it again.  Just as I would with Steel and Sounder, and anyone else I own.  If, after I let you do that, you still need to go behind my back and cheat on me, there are more problems in our relationship than can be fixed.”

He paused again.  “Yeah, that’s a good point.  You’re not the right one to ask.”

I’m polyamorous, y’all.  I have no problem with any of my subs playing with others.  I don’t even mind them having other romantic relationships, under the right circumstances (such as Kazander and his ex-girlfriend).  At the end of the day, I know they’re mine, and I know they love me, just as they know I love them.

But honesty is the most important thing.  And to me, it’s the difference between polyamory and cheating.  If you want to go fuck a porn star, go fuck her.  Knock yourself out.  Have fun.  But the moment you try to hide it from me, you cross a line that can’t be uncrossed.

More than once, Kazander has asked me questions like this, and then realized I’m the wrong person to ask.  When it comes to relationships, I’m an easy person to figure out.  Don’t lie to me.  Don’t hide from me.  And I won’t lie or hide from you.