So I saw the oncologist last week, and he ordered like a million blood tests. One of the tests has already been analyzed and I saw the results. And there’s good news and bad news.
The bad news is that the numbers make leukemia even more likely. Like, unless I have some weird, rare, undocumented condition, that’s what it is. But the good news is that the numbers point to the chronic types, not the acute types. Which is good, because the most common type of leukemia in adults is Acute Myeloid Leukemia.
Which is basically a death sentence. My age and the fact that I’m otherwise healthy help my odds, but even when people respond well to chemo, reoccurence is more likely than not, and one doctor said that he sees an average of 3 or 4 years between when people are diagnosed and when they pass away.
So that was a a definite worry. But that’s something you would’ve seen in a complete blood count. My numbers are high, but they’re not that high.
It’s the difference between, “well that’s concerning,” and, “bitch, you dead.”
Both the chronic types are easier to treat, slower to spread, and have higher survivability. I can absolutely deal with that.
But now I have to wait another 2 1/2 weeks for the next step. And I don’t know which tests he ordered, or whether he’ll want to do more blood work, or if we can just skip to the bone marrow biopsy.
Which is what I would prefer, actually. He said that, because the test is so brutal, he doesn’t like ordering it unless he absolutely has to, and all he had was my basic blood work results, so it’s understandable that he’d want the more detailed test results before going that route.
I’m just hoping he ordered them all, and got them all done at once. I mean, I have literally never had anyone take that many vials of blood at one time before, so it’s likely he ordered them all, but I won’t know until the results are analyzed and posted.
It’s always the waiting that sucks the most.
But I do have some fun things to keep my mind off of it. Like the new birth control pills I got for Sounder.
He hadn’t been taking them for awhile. An interesting side effect we noticed is that he completely lost his ability to jerk off, or cum like a man at all. The only way he can cum now is through prostate stimulation.
Like being fucked like a bitch.
Which I find amazingly awesome, by the way.
But I was curious to see if it was reversible. So after his 2-month supply ran out, I wasn’t in a rush to get it refilled. I wanted to see if Tammi Lynn would regain function.
But it’s been months and months, and nope, he still can’t cum like a man. So at this point, I’m assuming it’s permanent, and there’s no reason not to put him back on the pills.
So I went to see my gynecologist for a prescription, and to ask for a brand with a higher dose of estrogen.
And that’s where I discovered a bit of a problem.
As it turns out, all the leukemia bullshit interferes with a doctor’s willingness to prescribe hormonal birth control (I knew I shouldn’t have told her, dammit. I usually don’t tell doctors anything they don’t absolutely need to know. I broke my own rule and shot myself in the foot).
And it’s not like I could tell her the pills weren’t for me.
So she wouldn’t prescribe it at all.
My internist, who is an incredible doctor and easily persuaded, wanted to see me that afternoon for afternoon follow-up from a recent ER visit (I’m fine. It was “stress.” Because apparently no one told the ER doctor that female hysteria isn’t a thing anymore. Turns out, it was actually another symptom of, you guessed it, leukemia).
So I convinced him to prescribe the same pills he’d given me before. It’s a low dose of estrogen, but it’ll work. And I’m likely going to have to get approval from my oncologist if I want to up the dose.
So the low dose is as good as it gets for now. But I liked the effects it had on him before, so that’ll work perfectly until I can just flood his system with estrogen.
Because even though the effects so far have been relatively mild, they’re still there, long after he stopped taking the pills. His tits are still softer, his hips are still rounder, his ass is still perkier. Putting him back on the pills will likely cause some more awesome (and permanent) changes to his body.
Isn’t that exciting?