How do you dress for kink/BDSM play? What significance does your attire have to you?
There are a couple of different ways I’ll dress for a session. Occasionally, I will dress in the corset and leather you see in the Femdom porn videos. Other times (and most commonly) I’ll dress in a T-shirt or tank top and jeans. Sometimes I’ll dress in lingerie. Sometimes I’ll be naked.
I definitely think that my attire makes a difference. A subtle difference, but a difference nonetheless. And it definitely makes a difference to the sub I’m playing with. A corset, leather skirt, and thigh-high boots, with my hair slicked back and my makeup severe, portrays a completely different attitude than my normal T-shirt-and-jeans style.
Now, the vast majority of the time, I don’t dress particularly “special” for a session. I prefer being myself, dressing in a way that makes me comfortable and allows for a deal of movement and flexibility. As sexy as my corset is, I can’t bend or stretch or anything like that while wearing it. It looks great in the pornos, but doesn’t really translate well to real life.
As I’ve said a bajillion times before, and will say a bajillion times again, this isn’t a costume I put on and take off at will. And while dressing up occasionally is cool and a lot of fun, I don’t go walking down the street dressed like a slutty Dominatrix, so why would I do it during a session?
Besides, being in vanilla clothes most of the time has worked to my advantage quite a bit. If I have a boy come over, and I’m dressed in the lingerie and thigh-highs, he knows without a doubt that something twisted and kinky is going to happen. But if I’m in my regular vanilla clothes, he doesn’t necessarily know. I could just have him clean my house. I could have him draw me a bath or give me a vanilla back massage after a long day. I could have him serve drinks while I socialize with a friend. Or I could bend him over the back of the couch and brutally fuck him without a word.
See, it’s that element of surprise. He never knows what to expect, and I like that.