Becoming Jane

I like Anne Hathaway.  I like James McAvoy.  I freaking love Jane Austen.

Hell, I even like Seth Grahame-Smith, who took classic, timeless stories like Pride and Prejudice and mercilessly and shamelessly butchered them into horridly appalling, absolutely mesmerizing, completely hilarious parodies like Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (one of my top-ten favorite books, because it combines an awesome story by one of my favorite authors, with one of my all-time favorite things.  I mean, come on.  Zombies are fucking awesome.  And anyone who disagrees doesn’t have a soul).

Side note:

If you haven’t read Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, that needs to be at the top of your bucket list.  I have Pride and Prejudice basically memorized, and laughed my ass off through the whole book.

I want Seth’s babies.

“It is a truth universally acknowledged that a zombie in possession of brains must be in want of more brains.”

I mean, seriously.  How fucking awesome is that?

Just in case you’re not familiar with the late great Ms. Austen, the first line of Pride and Prejudice is, “It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife.”  I was in hysterics from the very first sentence of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies.

And it has fucking pictures!

(This is about where my favorite lit professor lost pretty much all respect for me as a human being.  Because he doesn’t have a soul.)

I fucking love this book.

I fucking love this book.

I’m rambling.  James McAvoy, Anne Hathaway, and Jane Austen.  All very cool people.

So how did I not know about the movie Becoming Jane?

Well, I duct-taped the spawn to the ceiling and found I had some time to kill, so I flipped it on in the bedroom and watched it.

And damn, I love that movie.  I had goosebumps at the end.  Fucking awesome.

Kazander happened to get home from work just as the movie was about over.  He walked into the bedroom and lied down next to me, staring at the screen with horror.

“This is the most awful movie I’ve ever seen,” was about the gist of whatever-he-said.  I was too transfixed by the movie to pay attention.

I said something along the lines of, “It’s the last five minutes.  You can’t judge the whole movie by the last five minutes.”

His response was, “Yes I can.  It’s awful.”

And then he made the mistake of saying, “If you ever want to really punish me, you don’t need a flogger or a cane or anything.  Just make me watch this.”

…. Oooh, baby, you should not have told me that…

I cannot wait for him to fuck up.

5 thoughts on “Becoming Jane

  1. polthusx says:

    As a writer, I study Jane Austen because each sentence is a virtuoso performance of style. Believe it or not, I wrote a five-page essay on the just first sentence of Pride and Prejudice.

    That said, her novels bore me to tears. They are executed with style and grace, but are about as entertaining as watching grass grow.

    So I was thrilled to hear about the Zombie pastiche. Still haven’t read it, but I’m going to soon after this post. –You just generated a book sale 🙂

    • Domina Jen says:

      Do you still have that essay? I’d love to read it. I read Pride and Prejudice in high school and immediately fell in love with it. It is my favorite of her books. It does read a little slow, but not nearly as slow as Moby Dick (oh my god, that book was such chore to read), and every few years I’ll go back and reread all her books again. I always find something new every time.

      Oh yes, Pride and Prejudice and Zombies is an awesome book. There’s also Sense and Sensibilities and Sea Monsters, written by someone else, but it’s not as good. Seth Grahame-Smith is the one who wrote Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. He’s one of my favorite humans.

      • polthusx says:

        I might have it somewhere on my hard drive. If I find it, I will let you know.

        But, here’s my thesis in a nutshell:

        That sentence is near the top of my list of best opening lines for a novel. Why, because you know so much about the world and it’s protagonist/narrator from this one proposition:

        ““It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife”

        One point regarding style, the sentence is constructed to echo the sound of an aphorism. That is a ‘general truth.’ Much like ‘A stitch in time saves nine,’ it does not invite argument. This says a LOT about the driving philosophy of all the characters in the novel.

        I could chatter away for some time, but I’ll stop there 😉

        Austen proves herself capable of delivering brilliant prose at a high register throughout the novel. Both a masterpiece and a yawn fest – but for fledgling writers, Austen is on the ‘must read’ list.

        Yeah, Grahame is doing some fun/intersting stuff. I need to catch up his work!

  2. Tom Allen says:

    I have to admit that I’m not a big Austen fan. I’m not even a middling Austen fan. But I really did enjoy P&P&Z. Because zombies. And ninjas. How could it be bad?

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