That’s Pretty Fucked Up, Right There.

Pretty much anyone who’s had a small child is familiar with the concept of “Mommy kiss it better.” The spawn gets a boo-boo, Mommy kisses it better, spawn runs off, rinse and repeat.

So this conversation happened after I stubbed my toe on the end table.

“Ouch, fuck that hurt!”

“Mommy, did you get a boo-boo?”

“Yes, baby.”

“Oh no! Where did you get hurt?”

“I hurt my toe.”

“It’s okay, Mommy. I kiss it better!”

And immediately, she jumped up and trotted over to where I was sitting. I sat, dumbfounded, as my toddler quickly got on her hands and knees in front of me and kissed my foot.

And what a coincidence, her father was just in that position himself not too long ago.

I realize it was innocent, and afterward she jumped up, smiled, said “I make you feel all better, Mommy,” and scampered off to continue pulling fuzz off her stuffed dog or whatever the hell she was doing.

Still creeped me the fuck out.

Ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew

Ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew

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